A Note to All the Children in the World

I came from a family of 5 kids.  I have 6 kids.  I would like to address a few things children who have at least one sibling need to know.  If you are or have an only child, many of these things may be true for you as well, I just can't speak to that as having no experience as such.  Now, the more children in your family, the more amplified these statements become.

1.  If you have a sibling, you might as well forget your name as you will rarely be called by it.  Just give it up, realize you will forever be "Be-Suzann!" or "Z-Allison!".  Don't bother correcting your parent.  They don't much care what your name is.  After all, they gave it to you, they ought to have the right to revoke it at any time.  And no, don't bother with nametags.  Sure you might think it's cute now, but when your parent is flustered with dinner burning, baby crying, phone ringing and someone at the door, they have lost the ability to read and are just as likely to revert back to "YOU!"

2.  If you have siblings, remember this, your parents really do love you best.  It's true.  You are their favorite.  Sure, there may be 10 of you, but you are their favorite.

3.  When you think you would love 5 minutes of peace in the bathroom and think "I will never be alone!"  just remember you will NEVER be alone.

4.  When you are a grown up, you don't have to like these people.  But it sure is nice if you do.

5.  Everyone must make choices with their income, from the wealthiest to the poorest.  If your parents chose family over stuff, count yourself very lucky to have parents who value you more than TVs, cars, vacations and dinners out.  The younger you are in the family, the more this probably means to you.  When you realize that the whole world thinks your parents are crazy for having 6 kids and you are number 6, it just ought to make you feel lucky to have crazy parents.

6.  Your parents are human.  They love you more than you can know, unless you have children.  They have a huge weight on their shoulders and trying to make sure you got exactly the same number of peas as Bobby and not 2 more is not on their grand list of concerns.

7.  If your parents have forgotten exactly when your first tooth came in, forgive them.  I bet they haven't forgotten the day you came in!

8.  No matter how many of you there are, or how often your name gets butchered, or whether they can remember whose shirt is whose, your parents would not trade you, even on your bad days, for anyone else in this world.

And lastly, a note to the parents:
The grass is always greener and someone else's kids are always cleaner. 

I'm linking this up at These Five of Mine Plus Two.  Check them out for more Handful of Heart link ups.

Siblings, Monsters or Friends?

I have discovered what I believe to be the biggest drawback to homeschooling. No, it's not socialization. My kids get to meet, talk to and interact with a lot of people of all ages. No, the problem is too much together time. You know how your kids start to bicker and gripe at each other after a few days of being couped up in the house. After about four days inside with your brothers and sisters, even the kindest children turn into monster children.

They grow three heads, five horns and their eyes turn red. Fire spits out of their mouths. Their heads spin around backwards. Smoke comes out of their ears. Their voices become like fingernails grating down the proverbial chalkboard. They become little monsters just waiting to pounce on the first poor, unsuspecting sibling to breath in their general direction.

Take that image, multiply it by 365 days, 24 hours a day. Increase it by 5 children. Now you have the image of a large homeschool family in the dead of winter. It's not pretty. It's downright ugly.

Yet, despite that, they seem to be inseparable. They are fiercely devoted to one another. When apart for only an hour they run to each other and hug each other. A few years ago the two oldest were going to an overnight at church. The two youngest were going to grandma's house (number five was but an infant and staying with Mom). They were spending less than 24 hours apart, yet you would have thought they were going to be apart for weeks by the way they were hugging each other and saying their good-byes. When the next year came around, the two oldest were again off to church, only to discover that this year instead of sleeping in the separate rooms in the same building, they would be in different buildings! They were visibly upset. "We've never slept in a different building before!" True. At 7 and 8 years old they had not been apart overnight since the second was born. They weren't consoled that Mommy would be staying with the girls and Daddy would be staying with the boys!

The most touching time came when our five year old (then four) ended up in the hospital with pneumonia. The kids were made several visits during the day, going back and forth to grandmas between visits. When bedtime came, they all were upset. Noah, at the hospital, wanted to call and talk to each sibling and during prayer that night prayed for each one. The kids with Daddy at Grandma's house where crying because they missed their brother. It was a time that really showed me how deeply they care for one another. They take for granted that their brothers and sisters will always be near them. I pray that this continues into their adult lives and that they continue to develop a bond that allows them to forever be the closest of friends.