Sunday, October 21, 2012

Day 19 (and 20) of 31 Days of Peace

Some of us had better hope our husbands don't read these verses too carefully.

Proverbs 21:19
Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.

Proverbs 27:15
A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm.


I've been focusing most of my thoughts of how to bring about peace in my home toward my interaction with my children and their interaction with each other.  But it is equally, if not more, important to have a peaceful interaction between husband and wife.  I'm not a husband and don't feel qualified to give much advice to them.  But I am a wife and have struggled through the above verses, and can share my experiences to encourage other wives. 

The Bible, the book that we as Christians look to for advice on how to live a full and rich life, mentions nagging quarrelsome wives, not once but multiple times.  Perhaps we ought to take a look.  A look at ourselves.  Are we nagging?  Quarrelsome?  Show of hands time, who here has had an argument in your head with your husband while he's gone at work which ends with him coming home in trouble for "his end" of the argument that he wasn't even part of?  I knew I couldn't be the only one!

I once had a pastor ask whether we would rather be "right" or "in relationship"?  That is not to say we never have opinions, never voice concerns, never disagree.  But there are many arguments in marriage that are simply about being right.

"Turn left.  It's the fastest way to get there this time of day."
"No, going straight is faster."
"No, I'm telling you, turning left will save 2 minutes with traffic like this."

And on and on this discussion goes until one party is mad that the other didn't listen to them and they arrive at the restaurant two minutes later than they would have.  Both spouses are angry and a nice dinner is ruined because we care more that we are right about the traffic than that we enjoy a few minutes with each other.

While that argument sounds silly, I encourage you, look at your interactions with your spouse.  Have you ever, upon retrospect, had an argument over things that are of similar importance?  Things with no eternal value?  Does it matter which way the towels get folded?

Share your experience, what is a ridiculous argument you felt justified in participating in, knowing you were "right" that you now realize was of no lasting value?

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